Hi 👋 I’m Matt and I’m autistic.

I was recently asked for some advice on how a manager could better manage an autistic employee. Rather than simply keeping my thoughts to a 1:1 conversation, I thought it might be helpful to write a discussion around it. Especially given the number of Lego sets I see in people’s backgrounds while in zoom calls.

This discussion is meant to simply provide patterns and advice. It should not be used as directed guidance for any specific person. When applying these patterns, you need to intensely learn/consider/discuss the specifics of that individual, their unique history, needs, situation, challenges, etc.

So, let’s get started with a bit of context around autism.

Autism is a spectrum, and presents in diverse ways. What works with one autistic employee might have no impact, or even be received negatively, by another. There is no one ‘right’ way to manage an autistic employee.

🙋‍♂️ What if you don’t know if your employee is autistic?

As their manager you might not know if your employee is autistic. You may ‘suspect’ your employee is neurodiverse, and you are looking to better manage them.

There are many reasons a person would, or wouldn’t, choose to disclose they have autism. They also might not be officially diagnosed (for many reasons).

Consider:

• They might fear workplace stigma
• They might not feel it’s relevant to their work performance
• They might be successfully masking (hiding autistic traits) and prefer to maintain that mask
• Their autism might be a private part of their identity they don’t wish to share
• They might still be exploring or understanding their own neurodiversity

Getting diagnosed can be administratively brutal and expensive. A large number of people are either late diagnosed, or undiagnosed while still suspecting (or even knowing) they are autistic. Personally, I wasn’t formally diagnosed until my mid-30s. I knew I was autistic for around eight years before I was able to convince a single physician to refer me to an expert for testing.

My spicy take is whether someone is diagnosed autistic or not doesn’t actually matter for a good manager. 🌶️ 🌶️ 🌶️ IMHO, all managers should have a neurodiverse friendly team + practices by default.

⚠️ There is a big asterisk here if the employee needs/requests a workplace accommodation. And in no way does this writeup deal with accommodations or any similar process.

So, what does a neurodiverse friendly team look like?

✅ Managers should create a neurodiverse friendly team by default

The best manager I’ve had at creating a team structure that was neurodiverse friendly by default was @benbalter. Ben did that by strongly embracing GitHub’s How we work practices + async philosophy and…

Focusing on needs, not labels

• What helps this person do their best work?
• What communication styles are most effective with them?
• What aspects of our work environment might be challenging for them?

Creating an inclusive environment by default:

• Everything should have a URL
• Provide clear, explicit, and documented expectations (via issue, slack, doc, whatever)
• Reemphasize flexible working arrangements (PTO reminders, not being at desk, etc)
• Encourage participation in any relevant neurodiverse communities

Building psychological safety:

• By default assuming people are acting with a positive intent
• Constantly seeking to deeply understand the viewpoint of others
• Demonstrate through actions that different working styles are valued
• Make it clear (repeat publicly) that accommodations and support are available
• Address any team behaviors that might stigmatize neurodiversity or make them feel like an outsider, like forced icebreakers/socialization or defaulting to sync meetings

🎯 Themes of Patterns and Advice

When I’ve been asked for advice on managing autistic employees, they have often related to:

• Communication and understanding: Some managers have challenges with what they are asking for being understood, followed, or just having positive communications in general.
• Managing change and resiliency: How can I help this person process changes, be they organizational, job responsibilities, etc?
• Maximizing their impact: How can I improve the impact of this person?
• Offsites and in-person events: What considerations should I take into account when meeting in person, or coordinating an offsite?
• Team and social belonging: How can I successfully integrate this person into the company, our team, our events/discussions, and help them feel like a welcome and valued team member?

🗣️ Communication and Understanding

Clear, direct communication is often appreciated by autistic individuals. But what does that mean literally? In my own experience, it means having a manager being comfortable with what are usually uncomfortable and extremely direct (and possibly long) conversations.

Here are some practical approaches:

• Establish communication preferences: Some might prefer async communication through Slack or email, while others might do better with scheduled 1:1s. Ask and adapt.
• Be incredibly direct: If there’s an issue, address it clearly and specifically. “I noticed X happened, and we need Y instead” is more helpful than “Maybe we should think about doing this differently.”
• Be explicit and literal: Avoid metaphors, idioms, or assumed context. For example, if you say “This needs to be done soon,” be specific about when.
• If in a sync meeting, go slow and allow for processing: Give the conversation room to breathe and don’t rush points, slow down and give time for back and forth.
• Check for understanding: Rather than asking “Does that make sense?” (which often gets an automatic “yes”), ask them to summarize their understanding or next steps. In my past I might often say a variant of “
• Document important stuff: Follow up verbal conversations with written summaries. This helps with processing and provides a reference point.
• If you aren’t understood, try providing an example: If you are trying to teach something, provide an example (demo, doc, walkthrough, whatever). Ideally this should be documented in some form, so that your employee can review it in their own time.
• Check in later: Give time for the person to process whatever you told them, and if helpful, give them additional opportunities to discuss and revisit anything they’d like for clarification.

⚙️ Managing Change

It isn’t uncommon for autistic individuals to have a contentious relationship with change or surprises.

For example, I have personally been reorganized or had a direct manager change every six months since I have worked at GitHub. Each time that has happened, I have had at least one week of low productivity and needed to take a few days off.

Practices to consider:

• Encourage time off and self care post-changes: After any major changes remind your team to take time off if needed.
• Offer extra 1:1 support: Make it clear you welcome any additional conversations (sync or async) around the topic.
• Boost broader communication to the team: Save them some stress by boosting all the important news in your team’s slack channel, rather than them having to search for it and find it for themselves.
• Coach any routine shifts: Changes in routines can be challenging to autistic people. Help address this by helping them understand how any changes will impact day to day routines/work. Be literal and explain what you understand, and what is up in the air still.

🚀 Maximizing Impact

Autistic engineers often have unique strengths that can be leveraged. Understanding their specific and unique strengths (or interests) —such as deep focus, passion for specific topics, and unconventional problem-solving—helps enable them to do their best work.

For example, I can uniquely see and create patterns of organizational change, practices, structures/processes, and systems. And I do great when assigned work that is paving a brand new path, but I struggle with constant work that uses a paved path (as I get bored).

Practices to consider:

• Identify and leverage their deep interests: Many autistic individuals develop deep expertise in areas they’re passionate about. Align work with these interests when possible. Simply have discussions with them around their areas of interest, and align it to where it intersects with impact. In the opposite sense, find out what type of work they want to avoid as well.
• Learn to leverage asymmetric thinking: Autistic individuals often notice and care about patterns and problems others might miss. Create space for these insights and interests, and encourage environments where effective, but unconventional approaches are valued.
• Enable distraction-free focus time: Make sure your team has the ability to block out chunks of uninterrupted time for deep work. For me this looks like having the ability to have at least 3 out of 5 of my days mostly clear for work, with blocks of ~ 4 hours for focus.
• Provide structure: Clear team practices, documentation templates, and process guidelines can help keep everyone on the same page. Generally it helps if they have a consistent way of working.
• Set clear success/impact metrics: When giving them work be explicit about what success and/or impact looks like for their projects, tasks, or whatever they are responsible for. Ideally this should be documented in an issue or something similar, and tied to impact.

✈️ Offsites and In-person Events

In-person events can be particularly challenging due to sensory and social demands. For example, when going to offsites I tend to travel by car or train, even if it takes my 4x as long. This is simply because being close to a lot of people on an airplane is overwhelming to me, and I avoid them if possible.

Practices to consider:

• Share agendas before travel is booked: Provide comprehensive information about schedules, locations, and topics beforehand.
• Offer quiet spaces: Designate areas where people can take breaks from social interaction and sensory input.
• Consider sensory needs: Be mindful of lighting, sound levels, and other environmental factors.
• Make participation flexible: Allow people to step out of activities that might be overwhelming, and make any group meals optional.
• Structure social time: Having some (optional) organized activities can be easier than an unstructured social activity or discussions.
• Provide alternative ways to contribute: Not everyone needs to speak up in large group settings, provide async ways for people to contribute during an offsite.

👥 Team and Social Belonging

Fostering an inclusive environment for autistic engineers means balancing support with respect for personal boundaries.

Practices to consider:

• Create structured social opportunities: Regular team rituals can be easier to navigate than impromptu social events.
• Respect communication preferences: Some may prefer written updates over speaking in team meetings.
• Address misunderstandings directly: Help bridge communication gaps between team members.
• Celebrate diverse working styles: Acknowledge that different approaches can all be valuable.
• Foster psychological safety: Create an environment where it’s okay to ask questions and seek clarification.

🛑 Anti-Patterns: What I would avoid

These behaviors can be frustrating or alienating for autistic individuals:

• Calling autism a superpower or being overly positive about it: While it’s important to recognize strengths, avoid framing autism as a superpower, which can minimize real challenges.
• Forcing participation in sync icebreakers: Mandatory icebreakers can be uncomfortable. Allow individuals to opt out or participate in ways that suit them.
• Speaking in corporate-jargon or avoiding being specific/direct: Be direct, specific, and talk like a human. Don’t avoid difficult or specific conversations.
• Using infantilizing language or treating autism as something to ‘overcome’: Avoid treating autism as a deficit or using patronizing language. Respect each person as a capable individual.
• Expecting identical social interaction patterns as neurotypical employees: Recognize that social interaction styles may differ. Respect these differences rather than expecting everyone to conform to the same norms.
• Insisting on specific communication styles without considering individual needs: Adapt communication to suit individual preferences, whether that’s written, verbal, or visual.

📌 Closing

The goal isn’t to “fix” or “change” anyone—it’s to create an environment where autistic engineers can do their best work and feel valued as team members. Every autistic person is different, so the key is to:

• Listen and learn about their individual needs and preferences
• Be flexible in your management approach
• Focus on outcomes rather than specific ways of working
• Create clear structure while allowing for flexibility
• Value their unique perspectives and contributions

Ultimately, successful management of autistic engineers comes down to understanding, adapting, and creating an environment where neurodiversity can thrive.